19. Be Direct

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19.  Be Direct

Instead of giving hints and clues here and there take a direct approach.  Tell your spouse that you would like to be intimate with them. Ask when the two of you can make that happen.  Or, mention that are feeling really sexy tonight and would like to make love, or say that you are really turned on and need him.  You could announce that you are going to have sex and ask if he would like to join you.  Or just simply walk around naked.   Clear positive communication will more likely create a positive reaction.

18. Take Turns

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18. Take Turns

If you notice that one of you is initiating more often, balance things out by taking turns.  One idea is buying a supply of marbles in two different colors, one for each of you. When you initiate sex place your color marble in a jar.  Continue to do this over a month’s time.  At the end of the month strive to have the equal amounts of his and her marbles in the jar.  Another option is splitting the week up between the two of you.  You take three days in a row to initiate sex, then one day off for you and your hubby, and your hubby takes the last 3 days of the week to initiate sex.  You and your husband should make the move at least once in your three days.

17. I Want You Signals

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17. I Want You Signals

A signal takes all the pressure off of initiating.  You decide the signal and what it means.  Together you can create a code word, put on specific obvious outfits, play a familiar love song, light a candle, place a sex toy on his pillow, lay a rose across his towel, or a soft caress on a certain body part.  When the signal is made you will both have a clear understanding of what the other wants.

  

16. Straddle Him

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16. Straddle Him

When he is distracted by the TV, computer, or games, straddle him so you are facing him.  Place your breasts up against him, making sure he has the perfect view of them, and rub them against his chest.   It will be hard for him to concentrate on anything else but what’s right in his face!

15. Wake Him Up

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15. Wake Him Up

During the middle of the night or the early morning put on something sexy then wake him, pop a mint in his mouth, and lay a huge kiss on him.  Let your hands travel to all his happy regions and you’re sure to start your day off right.

14. Touch Him

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14. Touch Him

Your man wants to know that you want him.  A good way to let him know you want him all over you is by caressing and teasing him in sexy ways.  Walk past him and gently swipe your fingers across his butt.  Mention that you love the way his booty looks in those jeans.  Caress his inner thigh while you are sitting next to each other.  Tell him how you love the feel of those legs around you. Sensual caresses and banter throughout the day will leave him longing for you.

13. Take a Risk

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13.  Take a Risk

When out in public mention that you would like to be a little adventurous.  Most men like being frisky in a risky situation because it gets their adrenaline pumping!  Nothing creates intense passion like knowing you might get caught.

12. Get Into Bed

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12.  Get Into Bed

Pretend that you are sleepy and ready for bed.  Ask him to tuck you in with a snuggle or two.  When he climbs in ask if he is tired.  If he says no, ask if you could borrow him for a few minutes.  Get handsy and let him know what you want.

11. Dine Him

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11.  Dine Him

Decorate the table with lace, candles, and fine china.  Keep your romantic meal in the oven warming.  Prepare a dessert tray with body desserts like chocolate sauce, whipped cream, melted peanut butter, and honey.  When he arrives home let him find you in nothing but an apron or a scandalous outfit holding the dessert tray.  Take his hand and explain to him that dinner can wait, you are having dessert first!

10. Rub Him Down

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10. Rub Him Down

Offer to give him a sensual massage.  Start with him on his back.  Use your hands, breasts, or other body parts to rub him up and down.  Turn him over and do it all over again.  Pay particular attention to his sensitive parts.  This massage will for sure end with a happy ending!

09. Kiss Him

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09. Kiss Him

Catch him off guard with a passionate kiss.  Just lean over, press yourself into him, and kiss him till he wants more. Caress his neck, squeeze his butt, and gently bite his lip. Believe me he is going to want more and more and more!

08. Build Sexual Confidence

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08. Build Sexual Confidence

This tip is for you if you find yourself feeling silly at the very thought of initiating sex.  I’ve read a few articles and they all say that the first thing a women needs is confidence. Your man is with you because he loves you inside and out. He wants your body as much as you want his. So there’s nothing to be shy about!  If you still need help in this area follow tip number one.  To help boost your confidence in the moment, put on an outfit you feel sexy in, brush your teeth, dab on a little blush and lip gloss, and remember you’re hot!

07. Try Something New

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07. Try Something New

Explore the great unknown together.  Scour the town for sculpting exhibitions, watch a foreign movie, try a local dive, embarrass yourself singing karaoke, or sign up for a community class. “When couples do new things together they produce more dopamine, the feel-good brain chemical,” which will help make you feel closer, says Dr. Zoldbrod.  After you try something new end the night by making love.  This will become a tradition that will catch on, doing it will become a habit after a fun night of trying new activities!!! 

06. Switch Times

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06.  Switch Times

How many of you have a sex time routine???  My hubby and I sometimes fall into this routine ourselves.  When we both hop out of the showers after the gym we know it's go time because we are both naked and have empty stomachs, which makes the timing perfect.  Maybe your routine is right after brushing your teeth in the morning or it's as you get into bed for the night.  Instead of making your move during your usual sex times pick an unusual time to stir up the heat.  You want to take your hubby by surprise.  Get out of your comfort zone and shed a few inhibitions.  Try anything that is out of the ordinary, like hugging him from behind when he's washing dishes and softly say, "Wanna do it?" Or asking him as soon as he gets home to go clean up cause you are in the mood.   Getting out of your routine will make things exciting for both of you.  Although, I'm not suggesting you break your sex habits because scheduled sex also leads to anticipation and excitement as you count down towards sex time.  Keep those sex routines and also add in a few extra unexpected between the sheet moments!!!

05. Remember When

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05.  Remember When

We all know this game.  One of you mentions a past experience and then you both recall memories of that event.  For this tip we are adding a sex spin to it.  Play the remember when game but only bring up moments when you were having amazing sex.  The next time you are relaxing together say something like, "Remember when we were at the gym and we got risky, frisky, and hot."  Or mention a vacation when you didn't leave your hotel room until noon.  Sharing these memories will let him know that you are thinking of him in a sexual way.   Reminiscing together about these past sexual experiences will pave the way for a new sexy memory.  Not only will this initiate sex but will also support the fact that you're a strong couple with lasting experiences that have deepened your bond together. 

04. Get and Stay in the MOOD

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04. Get and Stay in the MOOD

Do you find yourself having a "I'm not in the mood" day?  If so then this tip is for you!  Getting yourself in the mood is half the battle.  If you pay attention to your own feelings first you might find yourself initiating sex later.  How do you fight that battle and get yourself in the mood?  Spend some time day dreaming in detail about the last time you had sex or the last time you had hot sex.  If you focus on the details , what position where you in, what felt really good, where did he kiss you, etc, then this should help get you hot and bothered.  Other tips might be exercising to boost endorphins, wearing lingerie under your regular clothes, or looking at some naughty pictures of your spouse.  These tips will help remind you of the amazing sex you have with your husband all day long and get you so hot that you won't be able to resist keeping your hands off your husband!  What are you waiting for, start day dreaming!!!   

03. Shower Together

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03. Shower together

When your hubby gets in the shower give him a few minutes to himself, then join him in the shower.  Soap him up real good and be sure not to miss all the real dirty bits.  This for sure will get things going!!!

02. Sext your Man

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02. Sext Your Man

Throughout the day send sexy pictures or write an explicit message about what you are going to do to him when he walks through the door. He will be dying to get home and there's no chance of him being late. Surprise him in a cute outfit or with a handful of desserts that you will be using in the bedroom.

If you have initiating ideas share them with us. All of us ladies need all the help we can get! 

 

01. Talk About It

This is going to be a long post, but believe me it is going to be worth it. So take a minute and get your read on!

So I've come to realize that a sizzling hot topic for many women is "How to initiate SEX?!?" If you are having troubles in this area, just like I am and tons of other women, then you are going to be excited to see that I'm adding this to my regular weekly tips. I have found out that I'm not the only one who likes to be chased by their man. Most women typically wait for the man to hunt them down. All of us women who like to be chased have come to find that their men want to be chased too. Men get excited at the prospect of their women hunting them down. This doesn't mean you have to jump his bones the minute you see him or that you have to act like a porn star. What this means is that you've got to get a little creative in letting him know that you want him between the sheets. So every week I am going to share a tip that you can use to get him to give up the goods:

Chase Him Down

01. Talk about it

So it seems that many women find themselves wondering what they can do to initiate sex without feeling silly. I've read a few articles and they all say that the first thing a women needs is confidence. Your man is with you because he loves you inside and out. He wants your body as much as you want his. So there's nothing to be shy about!

The second thing you need is to talk about it. (These talk ideas come from The Knot's Nest Forum.) This talk should happen out of the blue like maybe after dinner one night. Start off the conversation with a few compliments: "I love you and I really love the sex that we have," or "I want to make love with you more often because I love it." or "I would like to initiate it more often or at least let you know that I'm in the mood." Then say, "What could I do to show you my desire for you?" Give him a day to think of some ideas.

The next night during dinner ask specific questions: When is he in the mood most or when is he in the mood the least. Let him know that you really like sex (insert time here) and follow it up with a steamy sex session you had at that time. Find out if he has a fantasy about you initiating. Tell him of a fantasy of your own where you initiate.

I know that was a lot of information but I wanted to give you some specifics. If you are like me the more specific the details the more direction I have! You will be glad you have this talk because now you have a road map of your honey's lust likes and dislikes. You will know what direction you should take when initiating. This should give you confidence in getting started. So what are you waiting for, go get initiated!!!

initiating inspiration

Ok so I was having a great conversation with a friend last night that inspired this post.  This is mainly for the guys and you frisky ladies.  I have this thing, I like being chased which means that I like my man to be the man and to make the first move.  I realize this doesn't always make it fun for my hubby.  So this post is for all those ladies who need a little inspiration.   So fellas and ladies what can a girl do to initiate sex?

PS the more answers we get from you fellas, the more likely you are to get jumped by your woman!